I Could Fly if my Wings Weren't Made of Plastic

Bugs suck...

I want you to picture something. You're looking out onto a peaceful pasture scene. Herds of bison roam freely while the rancher and his family enjoy a picnic in the mid-ground to the right of the frame. A playful dog hops towards their table, the golden light of a setting sun washed over his dusty fur. The hills of the pasture glow with a natural beauty and the wind gently lifts the amber leaves of the trees with its cool first breath of fall. In the background you see a quaint ranch house, the screen door invitingly cracked open while a black and white kitty cat relaxes on there worn in porch swing.
Just reflect on what emotions are stirred by this scene for a moment and then continue reading...
Now here is what you don't see. The bison are infested with parasite known as siduous nomisticius. They are a mite known for burrowing under the surface of the animals skin and causing a discomfort that the animal can literally do nothing about. The family at the picnic can't decide if they should eat or spend more time swatting the mosquitoes that plague them, and their animals relentlessly. Not to mention the annoying flies that seem to have taken a liking to Mama's home cookin'. Buddy, their dog, has heartworms and just a short time to live. Meanwhile their cat, Mr. Boots shares a parasite with Buddy common in pets, fleas. Not just a few flees either, a whole horde of them, because fleas don't know how to just hang out. They insist on spreading. As a final note, all of these horrid parasites have, in theory, entrance to the home through that beat up open door. In fact, no one in the rancher's family is going to get a good nights sleep because the skeeters have already staked it out and won't leave any time soon.
See how parasites screw everything up? I hate anything that makes it their life to suck the life out of something else. If you can't live on your own then why screw up something else's mess when you can do the world a favor and extinct yourself! Even the happy little life of a kitty isn't safe from the blood-sucking swath of the evil parasite clan! I say we bring out some of those bug killin' chemicals that were banned in the 50's because they worked too well and give the US a good old-fashioned hose down.
Of course...when your really think about what we as humans do...aren't we parasites of the Earth? Good thing the Earth isn't alive and can't spray us down with pesticide.
That's right! I said the Earth wasn't alive HIPPIE!!!

So, I know it takes two to tango but what do you do with three?