My Grandma

Betty Westbrook Surles
December 29, 1926 - February 2, 2007

Every once in a while something comes up that is not totally off the wall but is totally worth my time to write about. When I was a wee lad, there was scarce a moment when I was lacking in love and affection. My mother and father poured it all over me, (even though they spanked me, I still feel this way) and even my sisters took time off from being cruel to me on occasion. I think most people would agree with me on this point, though, that grandparents can spoil you like no one else. Maybe it's because they want to reconnect with their youth in some way, or maybe it's because they can give you back when they're done with you, but they are often the sweetest people in your life. My grandma Surles was as sweet as she could be.

When I think of my grandma Surles I think of all the delicious food she cooked. I think of trips to Hardees for fried chicken, eating it in the car and her making sure that no crumbs got in the seats. I remember times when she sat next to me in the back seat on the way to the mountains, she always loved to hear me call the Christmas tree farms "ho ho trees." Trips to Carter Pharmacy where she worked stand out in my mind because of the candy she would buy me and because I can still picture the way she stood behind the counter with her arms crossed. Most of all, I remember the time I spent with her and my granddaddy in their living room watching Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune, and the Discovery Channel. She would often sit in a rocking chair or the ottoman next to it and sometimes she would read to me. In particular, I remember her reading to me from a children's Bible. She'd read the story and point out things in the pictures that were of interest. I was filled with utter disbelief when, after one of our reading sessions, she told me I could keep it.

Not too long after my grandfather died, grandma started acting differently. It was only occasional but she would forget big things, or say something completely out of character. Eventually, we learned that she had developed Alzheimer's Disease. From around the time I became a teenager, I didn't have much to do with my grandmother and slowly, the disease took the grandmother I had known away. For the past several years she's been alive, but not really here.

It's a very hard thing to see someone you were so close to as a child become sick like that. I know several friends who have gone through the same thing with their family members and it hasn't been easy for them either. When my grandmother passed away this past Friday I was sad. Sad because I remembered the good times spent with her, grandaddy and the whole family at Easter and Thanksgiving and Christmas. I was sad because I know it'll be a long time before I see her again, but I'm happy that she's free now. When I went home the first thing I did in my room was dig around in some piles to find an artifact I hadn't looked at in years, the children's Bible she gave me. Giving it a quick flip I came to a break in the pages made by a piece of paper that hadn't moved since little Nathan stuck it there. On the paper were various poorly drawn faces. At the top I had written "there are many kinds of faces" and beneath that there were worried faces, sad faces, angry faces, even a kissy face. At the bottom the second line read "we hope you have this one" with an arrow pointing to and circling a smily face. I can't be certain but I think it's safe to say that by "we" I meant "me and grandma." If it's possible, if she can still hear from us in some way, I hope she knows that her grown up grandson still hopes she's smiling.